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Tuesday, March 27, 2012

I still don't know what to do... :(

I am sooo torn. Some days I am so ready for the bypass. Others, I want to just fix the sleeve and try again. I am scared of the bypass and the long term effects. On the other hand, it could cure my PCOS. I am so messed up inside trying to decide what to do. Does anyone have an opinion they would like to share with me? I am so desperate for input on what to do. :(

11 comments:

Judith said...

Hey,

First I want to say, I'm still following your blog but haven't commented in a while. I love seeing your progress and I am so proud of you. You really inspire me.

As for your request for comments on the bypass, my suggestion is for you to do what I do when I can't seem to come to a decision on something important.

It may seem juvenile - but it works for me. I actually make a list of pros and cons, and I assign a number of 1 - 10 of how important that pro or con is to me then I add up the totals to see which side wins.

I put the list aside for a few days to mull it over. Have a look again to see if I still agree the list and the importance of each item. I make any changes, then think about it some more. I give myself a week to "think on it".

Then I pull the list out again and ask myself the question and whatever my first, VERY first instinctual, gut feeling is on the question - No, or Yes - is what I go with.

If you go with your gut feeling that will be what you REALLY feel is the right choice for you.

Lyn said...

I don't know a lot about surgery. I am worried about the risks, especially in us moms of small kids. But the thing I would ask is:

are you gaining weight?
do you see gains that are warning you that you're in danger of a big regain?

If not, maybe take some time to maintain and let your body get used to the new you. It is a BIG change and your quality of life is quite improved, so if you can maintain and wait and see what happens over the months that might be helpful. I tend towards more conservative though, and your doctor might think you have medical issues that NEED you to lose more weight now. Anyway, just my two cents. I hope you find your answer!

Sunny said...

I would say, don't do anything until you are sure. Wait a while and let your mind calm and you will know what is the right thing for you. When you get that calm, you will be ready for whatever decision is best.

Lyn said...

I don't know a lot about surgery. I am worried about the risks, especially in us moms of small kids. But the thing I would ask is:

are you gaining weight?
do you see gains that are warning you that you're in danger of a big regain?

If not, maybe take some time to maintain and let your body get used to the new you. It is a BIG change and your quality of life is quite improved, so if you can maintain and wait and see what happens over the months that might be helpful. I tend towards more conservative though, and your doctor might think you have medical issues that NEED you to lose more weight now. Anyway, just my two cents. I hope you find your answer!

Lawgirl said...

Of course I will support you in whatever decision you make. I think you have done really well with the sleeve so far. I just would hate for you to go through another surgery and recovery.

Angela/Pretty in Orange

Taryl said...

I wish I had more answers for you, as I am very wary of surgical weight loss methods if only because of the longer term health impacts (which in some cases, like yours, are much lower risks than those of staying so heavy!). That said, I am for the lowest intervention process first. Losing more weight by repairing your sleeve should also help your PCOS, right? I think it is wiser to give that another go than take the more impactful surgery, the bypass, first.

Is the recovery worse on one than the other, or about the same?

downsizers said...

Why not try to lose some weight on your own and see if you can trust yourself and listen to your body for hunger and fullness? This is intuitive eating. Wait for a stomach growl, then eat what you want in small amounts, stop when satisfied (not stuffed) and then wait for the next growl. Get all the problem foods out of the house. Start getting some exercise in (3-5 times a week), and drink at least 64 oz of water a day. Low carb is a good way to start in my opinion. I was amazed at how the cravings left when I started limiting my carbs to 50 grams of carbs a day. You don't need more surgery; it's too dangerous and don't you think you should do this yourself to regain control? I really feel like surgery is not necessary to achieve something that you could do safely through healthy choices. Take care.

Linda Pressman said...

In OA we always say that the surgeries solve (and sometimes not completely) a physical problem only, when what we have is an obsession with food and two other aspects: emotional and spiritual. Since you've talked on the blog about being a Food Addict, why not try OA and see what your Higher Power has in store for you? That's my recommendation either way - whether you go or not. Ask a power greater than yourself!

Sarah said...

Someone once told me that opinions and advice are what you ask for when you already know the answer but you want to hear it from someone else. I think there is a lot of truth in that. I have a feeling you know what you want to do, but you just want to hear others say it too.

And.....I just managed to give you the most "on the fence" opinion of all. Really, I think you will do what is best for you at this time. Just keep your head up. You've come so far.

Sarah
notaneffingdiet.blogspot.com

PurseQueen said...

I'm 3 weeks out from the RNY so obviously can't tell you the long-term effects in my personal case, but thoroughly did my research and knew it was the right choice for me. I view it as whatever happens or comes along I will deal with at the time, and feel like if I am doing everything right (taking my vitamins, getting labs drawn on a regular basis, and eating right) I should minimize my risk for complications, and if something should arise out of my control, it won't be the first time the medical professionals have seen it, and they can fix it and it will just be one bump in the road to the greater goal of losing weight and being healthier. So far I am so happy I did it. The thing I struggled with most, my hunger, is gone. I've already lost 30 lbs, and my surgery went flawlessly..obviously everyone is different, but I had no complications, and only took pain meds the first few days after surgery, and after that was walking around and doing my daily routine. The pain was so minimal I really couldn't believe it. My incisions are small, and had my appetite not completely gone away, I would swear I never even had the surgery.

I know I could not have done this on my own, without this tool. A lot of people just say to diet and exercise and lose weight on your own, but it isn't that simple and easy, especially when you've struggled your whole life with being hungry. Obviously if it were that simple, no one would be overweight. I don't even think it's a lack of control. I am in control of what I put in my body, and made good choices before my surgery, I just ate much larger quantities of food because I was always hungry. It wasn't mind hunger either..it was full blown, gnawing, aching, headache-producing, keeps-you-awake-at-night hunger. I would chose any day to have a surgery to control that so I can feel normal.

I know many people who have had this surgery to cure their PCOS, and it works. Many were told they could never have children, and now they have several. It by no means is a miracle surgery, but I truly believe with hard work and this tool, it can really help you live a healthier and happier life. Obviously any surgery comes with risks but as I am sure you already know, the risks and burden of being overweight are far greater. I would really recommend reading obesityhelp.com the RNY forum. I know it helped ease my mind and reading everyone's successes and seeing how much their health improved really motivated me. Good luck in whatever you choose to do!

Princess Dieter said...

My advice, fwiw: Skip the bypass. Stop focusing on an external control. Get therapy and find the INTERNAL control. Talk to your spiritual mentor . Talk to the doctor about a referral to a cognitive or other therapist that deals with addiction/eating disorders. Realize you have to treat trigger foods like drugs or alcohol: stuff you must quit cold turkey. Talk to a dietitian about a sound eating plan.

Eventually, y ou will have to rely on your own self and deal with the issues. So, deal with the issues.

I have a pal who has had TWO bariatric surgeries and is morbidly obese..again.

You do not want to go down this road and keep having your body cut open.

I wish you the best as you figure this out. It's tough. But my advice: become the strong person you REALLY are and as an addict, accept that it's a hard, difficult fight with your inside issues and appetites.

We all gotta face it eventually. We are addicts...and that may mean permanently giving up sugar, trigger foods, etc. Accept it: give them up. Heal.

And we all go on, fighting our demons. It's how it is. We try to heal.

God bless...