I had to go to the surgeons office today to confirm that I need gallbladder surgery and I do. It's scheduled for this Tuesday. (prayers welcome) Anyway, yesterday I had e-mailed is PA with the comparison pic from my last post and she was shocked. :) So.... I have been asked if my pics and story can be used in their education classes and seminars! This makes me feel AWESOME because the reason why I started this blog was to reach out to and maybe help other people who were addicted to food. I allowed myself to get blog bullied by a crazy person and I retreated within myself because that is what the fat girl does most of the time. Puts her head down and tries not to get noticed. I was so sad that my story and journey was lost in the drama. Now, I feel like I get a new chance to help others. I have a new way to reach out to people who are suffering as I did. I went to therapy today and realized my entire outlook has changed in 5 short months. The clouds in my head are all but gone as far as being the fat one who wants to hide in the corner. I have never had a problem expressing myself, but I never felt part of the world around me. I never belonged. I was always the outgoing fat girl who made people laugh or cry. I made fun of myself before anyone else could so I was a “cool” fat person. I was accepted but I knew I was an imposter. They really didn’t know the person inside who was hurting everyday that I was not “one of them.” I could not shop in the same stores, I had no idea what it was like to get asked to the prom by someone who liked you. I smiled for the camera then cried at home. Even in commanding large crowds, I was alone. I now want to break down doors and be present in the world. I hope to be a small part in helping others get to this place. I still have such a long road ahead and a ton more weight to lose so I'm flattered that they want to use my story since it's really only just beginning. I feel so validated that I made the right choice for me. Now, I need to get through this second surgery. Thanks for listening.