It's on it's way... :/

PMS.  I feel it in every part of my body.  This is one of the times where I HATE PCOS because I get the PMS symptoms so early each month.  :(  On a happier note, Last night I was able to co-host a baby shower for a sweet friend.  It was a lot of fun and I didn't feel any problems with setting up or cleaning afterwards.  It was so nice to feel normal.  The shower was held at the same place where I rode the waterslide a couple of weeks ago. :)

* Countdown... my surgery is 28 days from today... 2 weeks til the dreaded all liquid diet.  I HATE that part.  For me, it was the worst part of my last sleeve surgery... :(

Dee's Tips & Trivia

Last Week’s Questions –

~ Ghostbusters was the #2 movie in 1984 ($229 million).  What movie was #1 at $235 million.

Beverly Hills Cop

~ What item found today in most kitchens was the strongest acid commonly known in ancient times?

Vinegar

~ If a square has the same area as a circle whose radius is one unit in length, exactly how long is each side of the square?

The square root of PI

Tips –

~ Those bed of pansies will bloom more prolifically if you take a few moments to pinch out early buds.  This encourages plants to bush out and to produce more flowers.

~ Prepare a mixture of one part vinegar and ten parts water.  Dump in your berries and swirl around.  Drain, rinse and pop in the refrigerator.  The vinegar kills any mold spores and other bacteria that might be on the surface of the fruit.  Raspberries will last about a week and strawberries almost two weeks.

~ Beer conditions the hair.

Trivia –

~ If all of the ice caps melted, the sea level would rise 200-230’.  The Statue of Liberty would be immersed up to her arm pits.

~ If done perfectly, the Rubik’s cube can be done in 17 turns.

~ There are approximately 7,000 feathers on an eagle.

This date in history (June 15^th)

~ 1752 – Ben Franklin experimented by flying a kite in a thunderstorm.  The result was a little spark that showed the relationship between lightning and electricity.

~ 1844 – Charles Goodyear was granted a patent for the process that strengthened rubber.

~ 1916 – Woodrow Wilson signed a bill incorporating the Boy Scouts of America.

Questions –

~ What are the 3 most frequently sung songs in the English language, according to Guinness?

~ What did Michael Jackson say instead of “I do” when he married Lisa Marie Presley?

~ Who is Audrey Faith Perry?

Quote –

“The mind that is anxious about future events is miserable.” Seneca

Make is a super duper weekend!

Dee

BEST.NIGHT.EVER! w/ pics

This weekend I took my oldest daughter and her friend to the "One Direction" concert.  I have NEVER been to a concert in my life so this was the first concert experience for all three of us. :)  I let the girls decorate the van so we drove to the concert in style.  lol  It was soooo hot and I had to stand for about an hour before they opened the gates to get in.  But I did it!  Not only that, I walked without ANY problem to our super awesome seats and was able to jump up and down with my "mom poster" several times.  lol  It was such a wonderful experience to have with my daughter and I owe it all to my surgery!  I have said it a million times... Even with everything that has gone wrong, I WILL do it all over again.  What a tremendous blessing to go from a wheelchair during our family vacations to jumping around like a school girl at a concert.  :) 

Final decision made... a new surgery...

Here’s the situation... I have my revision surgery scheduled for July 24th. Turns out the ins. rep on the phone gave me her personal opinion, not the actual notes from the meeting. Nice. Anyway, BCBS has a policy re: weight loss surgery...They will NOT pay for a revision no matter what the cause of the failure unless you have a medical problem that must be fixed with surgery or it could cause harm. (Like a leak, obstruction, etc.) Otherwise doctors would be doing 5 and 6 revisions on one patient and keep billing over and over. So, both my dr. and the ins. dr agree that although this isn't my fault, I don't have an immediate risk to my health due to the malformation. Back to the appt... To revise to the bypass would cost about $14k, NOT something I could ever afford and the bypass is NOT a surgery I am willing to have for several medical reasons. It's ok if you have it or want it, but it's not for me. Anyway, the Dr. said if he fixed the malformation it would not really help me lose a lot more weight. Maybe 30 pounds or so. I then asked him if he would be willing to make the sleeve smaller and he said yes! (Not many dr.s will do this because there is a standard size for most sleeves) I understand about the standard size, but not everyone is the same and unfortunately there is no way of knowing before the surgery is the sleeve size will be a perfect fit for you down the road. Back to the surgery... it will be like getting the original surgery all over again. There is a little more risk involved because it will be my FORTH surgery in a little over a year but if I don't get it done now I will have to wait another year (I can't do it during the school year because of my preschool) and who knows how much weight I could gain by then. I will have to get a loan to do it now, and then pay it back with monthly payments and our tax return.

Why am I doing this? Because I just want to be on the same playing field as most everyone else who had the sleeve. I have been at a disadvantage since around 6 months out and never really got to experience the full benefit of this surgery. I know that making the sleeve smaller is very tricky because if it's too small I could run the chance of not being able to swallow anything but I trust the dr. I know this journey is still worth the fight. I have reached all of my main goals. I can walk, keep up with my kids, enjoy my life. But there's more... I need surgery to remove breast tumors and at the same time they need to do a reduction. It’s not a good idea to do this until I am around a normal weight range so they can asses the actual size they need to be. I need more weight off my back and hips. I need to reduce my symptoms of the PCOS which ravages my body EVERY day. The dr. told me right to my face that the only way I can reach a "goal" weight is with the bypass (which I won't do) but by making the sleeve smaller I could lose about another 50-60 pounds. Lots of people tell me to just eat right and move around etc. and do the rest on my own. the truth of it is, once you have a sleeve and remove your stomach, your body functions on a MUCH lower calorie range than other people so most sleeve people will stop losing weight or gain if they eat over 1200 calories. 1200 calories is the absolute lowest you can eat while still being nutritionally sound if you are a "regular" person. Soooo... I still have the hunger like a "normal" person with the body of a sleeved person. To lose weight I have to stay between 500-800 calories per day. I can't tell you how horrible that is. The hunger is unbelievable. I can't imagine doing that on my own. I believe in the VSG. Even knowing EVERYTHING I know now, I would do it again and WILL do it again. When working properly as it does for most people, the Sleeve is a medical miracle that restores life, happiness, self-esteem and provides a life-long tool to help battle binge eating, overeating and bad food habits. I do believe in myself. I believe that I made the right choice to begin with and need to see that through. Thanks for listening.

Looking for some closure/ or maybe some real answers...

I have a "come to Jesus" meeting with my surgeon today.  I have so many questions and honestly some anger about this entire malformation thing.  The ins.told me last week they think it is the dr.s fault and he will have to fix it for free.  I am sure he will never admit to any fault.  Also, the surgeon who did my appendix surgery said she saw NO scar tissue on my sleeve which means I have not "stretched" it in any way.  (It would pull along the seams if I did) so here is yet another dr saying this malformation is not my fault yet I am the one suffering.  I intend to get answers TODAY.

Dinner last night

My husband said I out-did myself with this one. :)  Turkey sausage & broccoli sauteed with a laughing cow cheese wedge. :)  It tasted great and was VERY low in calories!

Someone give me a hamburger!

I am STARVING and VERY cranky.  This 800 cals a day thing SUCKS without restriction.  I am in a constant state of hunger.  On a happy note... Well, I can't think of anything right now because my mind is thinking of food. :)

I did have a wonderful dinner the other day.  I used my chopper to chop up cooked cauliflower which looks (and tastes) like rice then added turkey sausage.  An entire plate was under 200 calories.  I can't eat that much food so I cut the meal in half (after I took the yummy pic) so I could snack on it later.  Sooooo good.  I LOVE cauliflower "rice."  You really can't tell the difference.  It's just like rice only not sticky. 

To make the Cauliflower rice... boil cauliflower, don't over-cook or it will be to mushy to chop.  You should be able to stick a fork in it but it should not be able to slide right through.  Then get a good chopper and chop away! :)  Another good meal with this "rice" is to add teriyaki sauce and saute the "rice" with some chicken.  The possibilities are endless.  Virtually calorie free and filling.

HARD stuff

I will be meeting with the WLS soon to talk about the malformation of my sleeve and get a better idea on when he can do the repair. I know I am looking at maybe a year due to my other surgeries.  I am ok with that.  I am also going to look in to moving forward with the fight with the ins. company.  Right now I am eating about 800 calories per day in an effort to show the ins. company that I am capable of staying within that calorie range but it's the lack of restriction that makes that hard.  I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo hungry.  I am so tired.  But, so far I am pushing though minute by minute.  I will see at the end of next week if the lower calories has helped.  I can tell you that when I first had my sleeve and it had not yet grew the malformation, 800 calories was MORE than enough to keep me full all day.  I miss those days.  I fI had to find a downside about the VSG surgery it would be that once you have your stomach cut out you will always require MUCH lower calories than the average person in order to lose weight.  If your sleeve is functioning as it should, that is much easier to do since you can full on so much less.  If your sleeve is not functioning properly, this is HARD to keep up.  Oh well, it's just me and willpower at this point and all I can do is see if I can make it though the week.  :/

Some interesting Pics from today... :) :) :)

Taken at my son's "Last day of school luau." 

Yep, I think I look half-way descent!  lol

Today I reflected over this year and was once again so grateful that I got the VSG surgery which allowed me the basic functions of life.  It was only able to take me so far because of the malformation, but the things I prayed for came true and for that I am sooooo thankful.  I am thankful I was able to be my baby boy's room mom all year, go to school events for all of my kids and enjoy life!  Now, I have a big challenge ahead.  Do I stay this weight and wait a year to fix my sleeve or do I push forward and try to lose more weight on my own.  I choose #2.  :)  We'll see if I can do this over the summer.  Today I kicked off my summer by going on a ride down the same water slide I conquered at the end of last summer.  (Remember that?:)  Still fat, but happy!  Enjoying myself one year later, stronger, healthier.  :) 

This pick was taken of me today by my oldest daughter on said water slide... lol :)